cry...

Another day of tears at the office. I stumbled across the wedding photo album of a friend on Facebook and of course since I have wedding on the brain constantly to the point it's almost nauseating, I had to page through. Before I knew it, I was staring at the sensitive moment when the father of the bride is removing her veil and planting a gentle kiss on her cheek before handing her off to her waiting future husband... Uncontrollable tears welled up in my eyes not only at the tenderness captured in the photo, but more so at the obvious sadness that I would not have that same tender moment. Yes, my grandfather is walking me down the aisle and yes, I expect he'll offer a peck on the cheek before handing me off to my own waiting Prince Charming, and yes I believe that my father will there for it all in spirit....but none of that is quite the same as a girl having her own father give her away. It is a moment I covet with a deepening pain so striking I can't even describe it. I felt the same stark emptiness when I was shopping with my mother for her mother-of-the-bride dress.... She will also be missing that detail of having her husband with her at her only daughter's wedding. I know my entire family will endure the day with a certain sadness despite the joy I know I'll feel above everything else.... It is something I think of often and with great difficulty.