despair...

The emotions come and go like an ocean's tide... Steadily, up...and then down...and then up again. In the quiet comfort of my bed, I hear the grieving sobs of a mother, a wife, a best friend and helplessness overtakes me. We all subconsciously worry about one another, self-sacrificing our own... for the other. On my drive to work this morning, I marvel at the beauty emerging from a season of quiet death and find hope in knowing that like spring's blossoms, this season too shall pass. Just last year, I was happily reveling in the discovery of new love...and now this year I'm saying goodbye to an old love. Once a few days ago, I reflected on the closing of a chapter. Instead, it's more like the completion of one book in a series, and embarking into the hinted secrets of an unsuspecting future. Time crawls by with speeds of a parallel universe...ticking faster while the hands of the clock move slower. I want to wish it away, to turn back the days and hours with a simply whispered prayer...but then my heart gently tells me I can't. I must face this. I must pursue onward. I will never be alone and I know we will embrace again.

I love you, Dad and I miss you so much.