jangle...

Frustrated... Balancing... Clawing to some vestige of sanity.
The moment I'm able to take a deep breath, pause, relax,
a new storm stirs and grumbles in the wake.
A constant, involuntary worry, returning to the surface
no matter my aspirations to stir it down.
It's always clinging to the fringes of my thoughts,
inhibiting childish carefree whims.

To spin and twirl in an open field, surrounded by
warm sunshine and dandelion seeds floating on
the breeze; to give in to spontaneity.

Haphazardly contemplating the origin
of such worries, fears, obsessions...lessons.
The very best are the hardest learned.
A soft voice in the very shadows of my heart
whispers melodies of doubt, of withdrawal, of
abandonment. Again I silence it in
desperation, determination, resolution.