kink...

Perhaps I'm dwelling too much on the seasons, but I can't help looking around and seeing the evidence of change everywhere. From the vibrant leaves on the trees, to the cooler temperatures, to swapping out my wardrobe from summer to winter clothes to my husband and I leaving our newlywed status behind and entering into our second year of marriage.

Change is not always easy, and especially for me, change beyond my control is the most difficult. I am and always have been a planner. I like to know exactly how things are going to go and do what I have to to execute those things as they appear on my 'to-do' list. It's a very hard concept to swallow, coming to the realization that in fact I am very much not in control and instead have to not only sit back and let things take their course, but do so patiently.

Recently, I was made aware of the fact that although I am one of the healthiest patients at my doctor's office - a status that I strive to maintain through regular exercise, healthy eating (except for those ocassional necessary trips to the vending machine for something sweet and chocolatey), and quality time spent outside in the fresh air - there is something not quite right with me. Thankfully it's not major - so far as we know - and it's 'fixable' to a degree, but it's definitely putting a kink in what I thought were very well-ironed out plans.

It's easy to let this news brew and fester and allow even more negative thoughts, concerns, fears, and worries multiply in the corners of my mind. It's hard to try to force myself to not think about the worst case scenario and wonder what the outcome would be. And although it seems like I'm most definitely not the only person on the planet dealing with this issue, it certainly feels like I am. I wonder if there was something I could've done months or years ago to prevent this or at least address it. I wonder why out of the billions of people on the planet, I'm stuck with this.

I'm hoping and praying that it'll make me stronger, but most of all I'm hoping and praying that I'll be better. Because fixing this means far, far more than it seems.

Our finally finished basement....

From the bottom of the stairs...

From the cabinets looking toward the back...

From the back looking at the cabinet...

The bathroom/laundry room...

A better view of the print we got for the wall...

Most importantly, the tv and sitting area...

What will likely become my favorite spot...

sauce...

I know all of you summer-loving beach bums are lamenting the end of summer, so you may want to just skip this post before you get even more depressed. I can't help the fact that I love fall. It's only September 4th, but it's been a rainy, chilly day - perfect for a light jacket and an excuse to enjoy hot tea all day long. I will admit I'm not a huge fan of the rain - I'd rather a sun-kissed day every day of the week, but today's dreary weather just seems to be contributing to the overall aura of autumn. With the approach of the season, I'm anticipating all the wonderful pieces of fall that I'll get to enjoy and one of them is cooking.

Cooking is my therapy. I couldn't tell you when I first fell in love with cooking, but ever since I can remember, my mother always made us a homemade meal that was nourishing for body and soul. I can close my eyes and just picture her standing in the kitchen, stirring a pot on the stove or whipping something up in her mixer on the counter as we kids rambunctiously ran through the house like kids will do. There's just something comforting and homey about a meal made from scratch because part of that 'scratch' is the love and passion from the cook themselves. When I'm having a stressful day or just an overall bad day, I love knowing that I can just take refuge in my kitchen with a handful of ingredients and produce something delicious that will put a smile on someone else's face.

Fall makes me think of cooking and baking more just because it's more comfortable to be in the kitchen during the cooler months. Having a gas stove radiates quite a bit of heat into the kitchen and the rest of our house, so we try our best not to use it excessively in the summer when the house is already an oven. With the arrival of cooler weather, I have the freedom to make my favorite recipes and concoct new ones like butternut bisque and creamy potato soup and spicy chili with cornbread and tasty casseroles and delicious bread, cakes, cookies and pies, all made with the countless flavors and ingredients that abound in this wonderful season.

This is all coming about now because my sister-in-law graciously brought over a heaping bag of garden-ripe tomatoes; they're vibrant red color and succulent smell of the outside is invigorating and after just one look at them all, I knew I was going to make some homemade tomato sauce...and I can't wait! Today is just the perfect day to do it, too, because of the perfectly fall chill in the air.